Add Finding me a Husband to your To-Do List (Jessie Smith)

listSince I’m single and in my late 30’s, I feel like I need an excuse for why I’m still alone or I fear that my friends and family will come up with their own ill-fated conclusions. My shield of armor has always been to deflect with humor. In my 20’s I used to joke that my Prince Charming must have been hit by a bus and he lacked health insurance. When I hit 30, I turned the tables on my interrogators by joking that I’m clearly no good at finding a man so they must add finding me a husband to their to-do list. Ha-Ha! That should buy me some more time.

So while I’m waiting for love to magically show up at my doorstep, here are some of the lessons I have learned over the past 27 days at See Jane Publish…

·        I might already be having lunch at the same place as him. (Thank you M.L)

·        I might have already met him but he needs time to grow into a better man. (Thank you Melissa)

·        I might have to think outside-the-box and spend more time at Costco. (Thank you Jamie)

Once I find him…

·        I have instructions on how to write him love letters. (Thank you Linda)

·        I have some tips on how to have a happy marriage. (Thank you Nancy)

·        I have to get an FTD Membership to be able to afford all the flowers I could get from my husband (Thank you Sheryl)

SJP wanted to do something special for the month of February to honor Valentine’s Day. Since one of the main complaints about my beloved Romance genre is that they say love in those kinds of novels don’t exist in real-life this is my opportunity to thank all this month’s wonderful guest bloggers for sharing their stories to prove otherwise. If for no other reason, maybe I, your Single Jane, just needed to hear them.

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About Jessie Smith

Health Care Worker by Day, Aspiring Author by Night and 24/7 Staff for Riley (Corgie/Tibetan Spaniel Mix)

Posted on February 28, 2015, in Auth: Jessie Smith, Real-Life Romance and tagged . Bookmark the permalink. 12 Comments.

  1. And sometimes you just need to take the leap and follow up on your friend’s crazy suggestion… in the meantime, if your serious about meeting more men just smile at guys. We need to have lunch sometime and discuss strategies for you.

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    • “Novelists meet in local coffee shop to discuss strategies for marrying off friend.” I would totally read that book!

      Jessie, you are a great rom com heroine. May your adventures take you where you want to go!

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  2. You are an awesome woman! Any good man out there would be lucky to find…and have you. Keep your bar high 🙂

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  3. Hi Jessie, I hope you don’t mind me chiming in. Maggie’s advice is great, but I’m not so sure about the not actively looking part. I think that’s a bit like writing an amazing book and hoping that readers will find it all on their own. That great guy can’t find you if he doesn’t know you exist.There’s nothing wrong joining a dating site. I know people it’s worked well for. Good luck.

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    • Greetings Tammy

      Thank you for chiming in. Half of my friends have found wonderful people with online dating and the other half have some really horrible stories that I will incorporate into my novels one day 😄

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  4. Jessie, whatever you decide about marrying or not, please be sure to consult your dog. If you dog doesn’t like a guy, there’s probably a good reason to take a really close look at why not. Dogs know these things.

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  5. You are a fabulous writer and a fabulous woman. That is all. 🙂

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  6. This was my favorite SJP month ever, so thank you for doing it. As for you Jessie, you are wonderful and amazing and just fine without a husband. IF you want a husband in the future, I would offer three bits of quick advice.

    1) Don’t concentrate on looking. The harder you look the most likely you are to settle. Good partners come into your life easiest when you aren’t looking at all but happy with who you are.

    2) Good men are most attracted to a confident woman who is already happy and self-sufficient in the life she lives. When you bring your confidence and self-sufficiency to a marriage it is like sunshine in a garden. When you bring desperation and dependency to a relationship it is like too much rain and very tiring.

    3) Evaluate how open you really are to a relationship. Sometimes a woman has a list of “perfect” attributes the guy must have before considering a relationship. No guy is perfect and I can guarantee there will be a number of things that will drive you crazy. The question is which ones can you live with and which ones not. A well-written romance looks at the foibles of the hero and heroine and puts them through hell before they get together. So it is in life.

    Finally, there is absolutely nothing wrong with remaining single. A number of married women fantasize about being single again and having full control of their lives instead of always having to take someone else into account. Right now your only dependent is your loving, loyal dog. There is something freeing about that.

    To all those who butt in, try this response: “Thanks for caring about me. I’ve got this. I’m happy with where I am. When the right guy sees me for the amazing, wonderful woman I am I will be there.”

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    • As always your thoughtful responses are sincerely appreciated. I like your tips and will take them to heart.

      Ultimately I want my Happily Ever After but who knows what fate has in store for us so I just try to take one day at a time.

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